Again, perceptions give us all trouble. Unfortunately they also rule over reality much of the time. In the span of one 24 hour period I had one person (as far as I know) upset at something I wrote while I also got a note asking (to paraphrase a bit) if I had any offers of adoption yet.

Writing these posts can be both uncomfortable and at times therapeutic. Uncomfortable in that I’m revealing some details of my life without being too intimate. Therapeutic, because it is forcing me to look at myself and the world carefully. How they’re received is out of my control.

One thing is certain, I can accept that my predicament is through my own doing and choices. I followed my heart on things I felt I needed to do, and also on things I didn’t need to keep doing. Some of it worked and lately a lot of it didn’t.

So I can’t complain if the floor of the office is uncomfortable, or the back seat of the van is cramped and musty from all the rain. I can’t claim any broad understanding of life and its swings. The only thing I can rely on is acceptance that it’s actually happening this way. It was one piece of advice that stuck from a wise older person many years ago: “Trust your instincts. Even if you are wrong, they were your instincts.” Thus I keep moving forward, trying, hoping.

Oh yeah, one thing I can complain about is the radio in my van decided to stop working. How lame is that?

Previous posts in this series:

• Does Anyone Really See Me?
• Keeping Perspective
• Achieving Homelessness
• Showers at the Natatorium