Re-Homed & Off the Edge: Where Have I Been?

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I have to admit, it’s been rather hard to write lately, and for several reasons. One of the foremost has been that I’ve been painting for the past month, something that hasn’t happened for over a decade. The other is still the grappling with identity that underlines this whole period of ups and downs.

The painting has been fruitful, both in feeling a sense of normalcy and of urgency to reinvest in what is important. But it also keeps my mind in a visual way of looking at the world which is kind of contrary to the written lens I’ve been relying on for so long. Perhaps more importantly, on a deeper level it’s enlivened something within that has long been dormant.

To put it into context, it had been since 1999 that I had done any painting, an activity that had been so central to my life for quite a long time. And though I made more of a living as a freelance calligrapher and illustrator, painting was where my heart and soul seemed to reside. But 1999 was when several travel opportunities took me to other parts of the world: being a nanny in Switzerland; three weeks of meditation in a Buddhist monastery in Burma; and also when my tai chi teacher launched me onto the path of Chinese medicine.

So on one hand it was a time of new discovery and following new avenues in my heart. But on the other hand I had no idea at the time that there would be such a long delay before resuming. It wasn’t as if I turned my back on it either. Simply that I made life choices that took precedence in the moment, such as grad school, or starting a business venture. Plus there wasn’t the physical space to devote to the art.

All of the reasons were individual and nominal, but in the aggregate they became a long expanse of non-painting time that culminated in the circumstances that I’ve written about here in this blog. I don’t regret any of the decisions that I made that led to that set of circumstances. I always trusted the decisions in my heart and was willing to try something new. It just so happened that things didn’t go as scripted.

Of course I’m not under the illusion that some great renaissance is upon me and I’ll amass fame and fortune as an artist. OK, maybe there’s a little touch of delusion there, but hey it’s only natural. But it is a getting in touch with something deep within rather than something that I’m trying to market or sell. It’s reviving a dream to find the range of creativity where anything seems possible once again. I am an optimist at heart.

Feeling settled lately, I think about the general homeless situation and kind of feel sad. In my case I’ve come through a dark period and finally see some light. But how many of the others out there are still within the depths of their own personal despair? What will it take for them to see something that resembles hope and renewal? If I could lose sight of myself, and I had a generally solid background that “prepared” me for life, what about those that have less of a foundation to work from? How many lost dreams are there in their stories? And more importantly, will anyone ever really get to hear those stories?

I’m sure there are many homeless and un-homed who are lost causes for many reasons. But then again, many might just be a step away? Social services weren’t going to reinvigorate my interest in painting, nor were politicians and statistics on re-homing. No, my own heart had to do that. But it had to find some inspiration to do it.

So rather than compare desperate people to rats, let’s try to imagine ways to inspire the homeless to look for better solutions. Even if it takes a while it will be a better way forward. Just my thoughts as I re-find some of who I feel I am…

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About the Author

  • Joe Bright
    Joe Bright
    Joe Bright is a graduate of Iolani School and went on to study art at The Cooper Union School of Art in New York City, and later Chinese medicine at The American College of Traditional Chinese Medicine in San Francisco. Joe currently runs a small acupuncture clinic, Kama’aina Acupuncture in Kapahulu as the first dedicated low-cost “community acupuncture” clinic in Honolulu. Joe has a varied background that has included working as a bicycle mechanic, freelance artist, teaching calligraphy and Tai Chi, a nanny, and even a CEO of a small entrepreneurial company. He continues to create art, even having work recently appear at the Honolulu Academy of Arts as well the Bishop Museum. He also continues with entrepreneurial projects when possible and serves on the Board of Directors for a local Buddhist meditation organization, Vipassana Hawai’i.
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